Relapse (Doctor Dom Volume 4) (A BDSM & Medical Play Novella) Read online

  I made a face. “I’m going to make sure you really, really like me before I subject you to my parents,” I replied.

  She laughed. “No pressure, I was just teasing you,” she said easily. “But for the record, Patrick, I already really, really like you.”

  Chapter 14

  Lisa:

  Patrick called me Monday afternoon when I was at work. “My week is hell,” he said. He sounded slightly aggrieved by the situation, and I bit back my smile. “The only nights I can hang out are tonight and Friday night. Sorry.”

  I eyed my calendar. Mandy, Monica and I were going to grab drinks tonight. I told him that, and he made a noise expressing his frustration.

  “I don’t want to cancel,” I told him. Once upon a time, my heart would have stilled, thinking that was what he was asking me. But we knew each other better now, and I was fairly sure that wasn’t where Patrick was going.

  “No, of course not,” he said, sounding surprised. “But would it be demanding of me to ask you to come spend the night here after? If you don’t have to wake up too early in the morning for work?”

  I checked. “I can do that,” I smiled. “How sober should I remain?”

  He laughed. “That depends on how much you want to play,” he replied. “But if you decide to get really, really drunk, please call me so I can come and pick you up.”

  I made a face into the phone. “There are these things called cabs in Toronto, Patrick, I’m not sure if you’ve seen them? Yellow? Flashing sign on top?”

  He tut-tutted into the phone. “That poor ass of yours,” he said sympathetically. I heard a voice in the background, and it sounded like the voice was paging someone. “Okay, I’ve got to run. See you tonight, baby. I should be home any time after eight.”

  ***

  Mandy and Monica eyed me with concern as soon as I walked into the bar. “What?” I asked them.

  “Nick? At the bar, Saturday?” That was Mandy. Her tone was gentle. Clearly, the two of them were expecting me to be a lot more perturbed about it than I actually was. Truth was, it had barely crossed my mind. I’d been much more preoccupied with needing to tell Patrick about my failure to safe word. Well, that and the hot sex.

  “I’m okay,” I told them. “I had a moment of personal growth and clarity.” I ordered a drink from the smiling waitress.

  “That sounds very new-age,” Monica said. She wrinkled her nose as she said it.

  I laughed. “It does, doesn’t it? Don’t worry, I’m not going to go all Dr. Phil on you. But you know, as much as Nick was a jerk, I realized that it was also slightly my fault that I didn’t speak up. Tell him what I wanted. Then, I saw him with the girl he was with, and she didn’t look damaged. She looked happy. He isn’t going around ruining the lives of young women. I think we both made mistakes there.”

  Mandy rolled her eyes. “You are being a bit kind to Nick,” she said dryly. “I mean, the guy’s my boss, and I’m not saying he is a complete waste of space, but he chased you pretty ruthlessly when you were very young.”

  The waitress showed up with my wine, and I thanked her and took a sip. “Yeah, okay, fair enough. He was a jerk. But I don’t get a complete free pass on this. Plus,” I added with a smile, “I’m dating Patrick now, and things are great. The past is finally just the past.”

  The two of them looked relieved. “So, Patrick, things are great? Tell us more?” Monica’s eyes were gleaming with interest. “And Lisa? I have a one-year old. My sex life is pretty non-existent at the moment, so feel free to spill the dirty details.”

  I laughed. “I’m not going to kiss and tell,” I told Monica, and she made a face at me.

  “Okay, fine,” she grumbled. “Who was the guy with Natalie?”

  Ah, gossip. We speculated about Charles and Natalie, then we switched to talk about our jobs. Monica’s maternity leave was almost up, and she was not looking forward to returning to work. I could understand; she was a lawyer who worked insane hours. It would be hard work juggling everything.

  “Ethan is going to work from home,” she said. “We are going to get a nanny as well, but I’m still not looking forward to it. I mean, on one hand, I’m looking forward to talking about things that aren’t diaper changes; to wearing clothes that aren’t sweat pants, but at the same time, I’m pretty sure I’m going to be twice as exhausted all the time.”

  I looked at her pointedly, and Mandy giggled. “Monica,” I said, “I’ve never seen you in a pair of sweat pants in my life.” Even in the heights of new baby lack-of-sleep, Monica had always managed to look like a yummy mummy. I had no idea how she did it. Mandy and I were constantly admiring her for her ability to be pulled together all the time.

  “It was a figure of speech,” Monica said, slightly defensively. We all laughed. The two of them called for more drinks, but remembering what Patrick had said, I switched to water after my second glass of wine. I wanted to play. In response to their raised eyebrows, I grinned. “Patrick’s promised to spank me if I stay relatively sober,” I giggled, and that set us all off in peals of laughter.

  ***

  It was almost midnight when I caught a cab to Patrick’s place. I rang the doorbell, and beamed at him when he answered. “Hey,” I greeted him. “I’ve come for a quickie.”

  He laughed aloud. “In that case,” he winked at me, “you’ve come to the right place. Come on in, want a drink?”

  “No,” I replied. “I’ve had two glasses of wine, and I want to play.”

  “Two,” he mused. “Are you sober enough to play?”

  I nodded. “It was over the course of the entire evening. I’m good.”

  “Okay,” he accepted easily. “It will actually have to be a quickie though. I have to get up excruciatingly early. I’m due at work at seven.”

  “Ouch,” I replied. “We don’t have to do anything if you need to sleep.”

  “Oh, but I want to, Lisa.” His tone was firm; there was a gleam in his eyes. “Come. Let’s go up to the examination room. That okay?”

  “That’s almost always okay by me,” I replied. I bit my lip to prevent myself from beaming wide.

  ***

  The examination table didn’t have the stirrups today. It was also folded down so it looked more like a short bench.

  “Bend over,” Patrick instructed quickly. I saw the supplies for an enema set up already – the enema bag was hanging on the stand and the nozzle hung from the side.

  “An enema?” I asked, not concealing the skepticism from my voice. “Really? Didn’t you say this was a quickie?”

  He gave me a look, and I gulped. Up in this room, Patrick was my Dom, and I didn’t really get to make smart ass comments without consequences. “I don’t have time to punish you properly tonight,” he said, a bite in his voice. “I’ll settle for an extra five minutes. Now, before you make things worse for yourself, stop talking, get naked and bend over the table.”

  I obeyed, chastened. An extra five minutes of what? But I didn’t ask.

  Patrick’s hands took my wrists in his, and fastened cuffs on them, and then buckled them together behind my back. “Spread your legs,” he ordered, and I could feel him part my ankles wide, and then tie them down to either side of the bench. “Nice,” he said, with satisfaction in his voice, as he ran his hands up my legs, stroking my calves, rubbing the back of my knees with his fingers, grazing the inside of my thighs with his knuckles. I wriggled in need as I felt his touch on me, and though I knew I would likely get punished, I pushed back restlessly against him.

  He just chuckled. “Keep still,” he ordered. I could feel him rise, and when he reappeared in front of me, he had the Hitachi in his hand, and a sadistic smile on his face. “How many times do you think you can come while you are holding the enema?” he asked. “Let’s find out, shall we?”

  I closed my eyes briefly, and when I opened them, I didn’t conceal the laughter in my eyes. I had no illusions. In seconds, I was going to be begging for the vibrator to be taken away, and my body was
going to be trapped between the sensations of the vibrator and the cramps caused by the enema. But strangely, I was completely looking forward to seeing what I could take.

  In the safe space that I inhabited with Patrick, I could be completely myself. I could push every limit, and I could do it entirely without fear.

  “You look excited by this, Lisa,” Patrick smiled at me.

  “I am, Dr. Anderson,” I said. “Am I wrong to be?”

  He laughed. “We’ll find out,” he said dryly. He moved behind me, and I could feel the vibrator part the folds of my pussy and nestle against my clitoris. He fastened it to the table somehow, but didn’t turn it on. He didn’t really need to; I was already dripping wet at the idea of the torture he was going to put me through.

  “Let’s get this going,” he said cheerfully, and I could feel his fingers trickling some lube on me, and then the nozzle was inserted into my ass, and the liquid started flowing in me.

  This time, it was uncomfortable right from the start. It was the way I was bent over the bench. My belly was compressed against the leather, and I groaned as the liquid filled me up and caused my stomach to distend.

  “Are you okay, Lisa?” Patrick’s voice was calm.

  I bit my lip but nodded as he removed the nozzle and inserted the butt plug in my ass.

  “You’ll have to hold it for twenty minutes,” he said, ignoring my whimper of protest. “But before you open your mouth and tell me what you think about that, I’d like to warn you that each display of brattiness will make me add on five minutes.”

  I gritted my teeth in frustration. Yes, I could just use the red/yellow indicator, but I didn’t want to do that. Besides, he had just turned the vibrator on, and suddenly, my focus was torn from the discomfort of the enema as the pleasurable pulse waves from the Hitachi started running through my body.

  “Do I need to ask for permission to come?” I gasped out, while I still had the power to think.

  He chuckled. “No, that’s just setting you up to fail. Come whenever you want. In about five minutes, you are going to be pleading with me to remove the vibrator.” He moved in front of me, and leaned forward to kiss me, a slow, languid kiss that left me breathless and panting. Though the panting could have had a lot to do with the Hitachi on my clitoris.

  “You know, it occurs to me that you might need more distraction,” he said, pulling back. He was wearing a faded pair of jeans and a soft grey cotton t-shirt, and he quickly shed them and placed his hard, erect cock at my mouth.

  “Mmm,” I moaned in pleasure as he rubbed the head of his cock all over my lips. I waited with an open mouth for him to allow me to suck on it.

  My first orgasm caught me unawares. One moment, my mouth was open and I wanted to suck his dick, and the next, the intensity from the vibrator had built to an unbearable peak, and I curled my fingers into a fist, and writhed and flailed as I climaxed with a screaming groan.

  My clitoris was immediately too sensitive, but the Hitachi was unrelenting. Patrick shoved his dick into my mouth as distraction, and I moaned in gratitude. I focused on moving my head over his rock-hard cock, sucking and swirling my tongue around the sensitive underside of his dick, flicking my tongue and savoring the taste of his pre-cum, inwardly exultant at his growl of pleasure.

  The dull hum of the Hitachi receded slightly to the background as I focused on giving Patrick pleasure. His hands curved around my face and gently stroked my cheek. “Ah, Lisa,” he said, his voice ragged. “You are so lovely.”

  That was it. The need in his tone, the sweetness of his words, his hands on my face – everything pushed me into my second climax, and I came, bucking hard as he hastily pulled out so my teeth wouldn’t graze against his dick.

  I giggled in part-pain, part-pleasure when I was done. My stomach was cramping, my clitoris was tender, and I’d almost bit into my Dom’s dick. I warily looked up at him. He was trying hard not to laugh.

  “Sorry about that,” I said meekly.

  He narrowed his lips, but I could see the amusement dance in his eyes. “Some training is needed here, I see,” was all that he said. He pushed his dick back into my mouth, and I moaned with pleasure as I felt him slide in.

  He slid in and out of my mouth, and I came a third and fourth time. Finally, I flailed in desperation. My clitoris was painfully sensitive, and the vibrations were plain torture. “Patrick, please…” I begged. “Red.”

  He immediately pulled out and turned off the vibrator, and uncuffed my hands. His hands ran down my body, soothing me and calming me, untying the bonds that held my ankles open, and I took a deep breath and straightened, leaning on to him for support.

  “Want to expel the enema?” he asked me, and I nodded wordlessly. He helped me towards the bathroom, and I shut the door and waited till I heard him walk away before I took care of business. When I felt more human again, I went back outside.

  “Come here,” Patrick called from the bedroom, and I slid on the bed next to him. “I interrupted your blow-job,” I said sheepishly, and he gently pushed away a curl of hair from my forehead.

  “Never mind about that for a minute,” he said. “Are you okay?”

  I nodded. “I couldn’t take the vibrator anymore,” I said. He chuckled and I lay with my head on his shoulder for a soothing minute until I scrambled to my knees. “I want to make you come,” I begged, and he looked at me with concern, before he nodded, and I slid down his body and rubbed my breasts against his half-erect cock.

  He laughed. “God, that’s hot,” he said, and I grinned and pushed my breasts together, and he pushed his dick between them. Each time his cock came close to my mouth, I daintily licked his head, and he groaned deep in his throat in reaction. I teased him for minutes, until he finally looked at me and growled “enough,” and I opened my mouth, relaxed my throat, and took the entire, hard length of him in my mouth.

  “Ah fuck, Lisa,” he moaned, his hands tightening in my hair. “I’m really close.” I made a noise signifying assent, and redoubled my efforts on his dick. It wasn’t long before he pushed his dick deep down my throat, and I felt his spurts of come in my mouth.

  I pulled out, licking a spot on the head of his cock, and giggling a little at his hiss of pain. He reached automatically for my clitoris, and I swatted away his hands, and he chuckled.

  “That was a good quickie,” I muttered, as I turned on my side and started forming my cocoon of blankets, and he made a noise of assent, and he snaked an arm around my waist, and we both fell asleep.

  Chapter 15

  Lisa:

  I was going to tell him about the night I wouldn’t have used my safe word.

  I’d spent the last few weeks with it prickling the back of my mind. This past week, I’d been actively contemplating telling him.

  The deciding factor? I didn’t want to double-down on the dishonesty. The decision to refuse to use my safe word had been a mistake. A stupid mistake, but an honest one, born out of my confusion about what it meant to be a good submissive.

  But not telling Patrick? To me, that was tantamount to a lie. I had already hesitated a shameful amount of time. As much as I loved him, and as much as it would break me apart if this caused the end of our relationship, I knew I couldn’t live in a lie. This had, in my mind, already grown to be something a lot larger than it had been initially. I would be honest and I would take my lumps like a grown-up.

  Would heartbreak result? I crossed my fingers and my toes. I desperately hoped not.

  ***

  Friday night, I’d asked Patrick to come over, and I had cooked dinner. So far, our food history involved quick meals grabbed in bars and little ethnic dives that Patrick found. I wanted to make a proper meal. I didn’t cook often, but when I did, I really enjoyed myself. Plus, if there was going to be a massive fight, I wanted it to happen in the privacy of my condo.

  After a dinner of pseudo-Thai curry and jasmine rice, with mango ice-cream for dessert, we were lounging on my couch, with beer in our hands, trying to a
gree on a movie to watch on Netflix. I kept shooting sideways looks at Patrick.

  “What’s the matter?” he asked me finally, looking up from my Netflix queue. Seriously. A zillion movies, and nothing we could both decide to watch.

  “I have something to say,” I said. My heart was thumping. My words – this could result in our breakup. Things were good with us, but I knew that what I had done would hit Patrick’s triggers about BDSM.

  “What’s up, Lisa?” He had picked up on the nervousness in my voice. He could tell that I was upset, and he instinctively pulled my body into his on the couch, and cradled me in his arms. I swallowed. Tried not to cry at his sweetness.

  “You remember the day my mom was sick? When you punished me in the examination room?” The day I’d called him after ignoring him for more than a week, running away from him due to my emotional fucked-up-ness. I still felt guilty that I had called him when I needed him in the hospital. To this day, I felt like I had used him that night.

  “Mmm,” he replied.

  “You wanted to punish me later, and I pushed you to punish me that day,” I said.

  He looked wary as I spoke. His entire body had stiffened. Every bit of body language indicated how tense he was at that moment. “I remember,” was all he said. “I probably shouldn’t have done it that day. You weren’t exactly in the right emotional state to make that decision.”

  I shook my head. “That’s not what I’m getting at,” I said. I gulped. This was it. “I need to confess something. That night, I wouldn’t have used my safe word. I felt like I needed to atone for not picking up your calls.”

  He gave me a look of utter horror, and I gulped. Fuck.

  “Please tell me you are joking.” There was forced calm in his voice.

  I shook my head. I didn’t trust myself to speak at that moment. I could see what he thought. How shocked he was at how unsafe my behaviour had been. I had failed to be responsible for my own safety that night.

  “Fuck.” His voice was flat. I could feel him start to distance himself.